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7 Jokes about Grammar & Punctuation

  Tags: Punctuation | Joke | Grammar
 Language Learning Forum : Philological Room Post Reply
63 messages over 8 pages: 1 2 35 6 7 8 Next >>
Ari
Heptaglot
Senior Member
Norway
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2314 posts - 5695 votes 
Speaks: Swedish*, English, French, Spanish, Portuguese, Mandarin, Cantonese
Studies: Czech, Latin, German

 
 Message 25 of 63
18 November 2011 at 6:48am | IP Logged 
Alright, sorry about all of these, but having done Mandarin, Cantonese and French, I have to do one in Swedish, even though all of these are related to grammar, not punctuation. Especially since making puns is apparently a sign of mastery!

En man går in i en pub. Bakom disken står en bar man som olyckligt utbrister "Jag förlorade jobbet på grund av särskrivning!".

This one almost works in English. Almost. A man walks into a pub. Behind the counter is a bar(e) man who proclaims unhappily: "I lost my job because of a mistake of word separation!".

Edited by Ari on 18 November 2011 at 6:49am

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DaraghM
Diglot
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Ireland
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 Message 26 of 63
18 November 2011 at 10:04am | IP Logged 
A text message walks into a bar, lol :-)
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crafedog
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 Message 27 of 63
18 November 2011 at 10:31am | IP Logged 
An agglutinative language bar into walks.
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leosmith
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United States
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 Message 28 of 63
18 November 2011 at 1:36pm | IP Logged 
An adjective walks into a bar with a piano entertainer, sits down and orders a beer. The piano player's monkey soon
jumps on the bar and urinates in the adjective's beer. The adjective yells to the piano player, "Hey, do you know
your monkey just peed in my beer?" The piano player says, "No, but if you hum a few bars, I might remember it!"
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tommus
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CanadaRegistered users can see my Skype Name
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 Message 29 of 63
18 November 2011 at 1:37pm | IP Logged 
Language learner walk into bar. Barman say: "What will you for drink"? Learner say:
"Scotch on the stones please thank you".
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leosmith
Senior Member
United States
Joined 6552 days ago

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Speaks: English*
Studies: Tagalog

 
 Message 30 of 63
18 November 2011 at 1:51pm | IP Logged 
A Sumerian Verb Chain walked into a bar, and cheerfully asked "Hi! Can I have a beer?" The bartender gave him a
dirty look and said "Hell no! We don't serve chains in this bar. Get out!" The Verb Chain walked out, disappointed,
when suddenly he got an idea. He rolled around on the ground, getting straw and grass stuck to himself, and tied
himself into a knot. He returned to the bar. "Give me a beer!' he said, in a deep voice. The bartender looked at him
and said "Hey, aren't you that same chain that was in here a few minutes ago?" The Sumerian Verb Chain looked him
straight in the eye, and said "I'm a frayed knot!"
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vonPeterhof
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Russian FederationRegistered users can see my Skype Name
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 Message 31 of 63
18 November 2011 at 3:20pm | IP Logged 
crafedog wrote:
An agglutinative language bar into walks.

Don't you mean an SOV language?
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DaraghM
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Ireland
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Speaks: English*, Spanish
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 Message 32 of 63
18 November 2011 at 3:23pm | IP Logged 
A Irishman, an Englishman, a horse, a gorilla, and an alien walk into a bar. Barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"


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