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Are you shy about speaking?

  Tags: Shyness | Speaking
 Language Learning Forum : General discussion Post Reply
50 messages over 7 pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7  Next >>
numerodix
Trilingual Hexaglot
Senior Member
Netherlands
Joined 6785 days ago

856 posts - 1226 votes 
Speaks: EnglishC2*, Norwegian*, Polish*, Italian, Dutch, French
Studies: Portuguese, Mandarin

 
 Message 1 of 50
22 August 2009 at 3:57pm | IP Logged 
Speaking has always been the weakest aspect of any language to me. Originally, with English, it took a long long time to get fluent for real, despite reading and writing at a level far above that. Then with French, where I never mastered the grammar, I would never speak outside of class because I felt so pathetic about it. And I didn't want to be one of those people who make lots of mistakes in their speech and seem to be careless/oblivious about it.

But beyond that, the problem is the interaction. Even if I can say something correctly, I fear the response will come back in a form I don't understand and what then. After all, there's a pretty wide gap between reading and listening, dialects and accents thrown into the mix. I'm sure that kind of thinking is quite detrimental though, but merely knowing that doesn't make it go away.
1 person has voted this message useful



healing332
Senior Member
United States
Joined 5622 days ago

164 posts - 211 votes 

 
 Message 2 of 50
22 August 2009 at 9:18pm | IP Logged 
I think you have hit on a point that I have continually made. Those who do not speak are afraid. Actually it is all ego and pride. We say we do not want to sound stupid but this is just pride. I speak Svenska all the time when I meet swedish people. We always have great conversations and I ask questions about my pronounciation( i am also very outgoing and this helps)

The very educated often carry a lot ego and often cannot laugh at themselves or life. I travel a lot in my occupation and this week i met a great swedish couple ..we laughed ..and had fun with the language. They were shocked that i have only been studying this language for 7 weeks

Here is a link that i posted before that shows you MUST speak for the brain to learn the language

http://brainconnection.positscience.com/topics/?main=fa/seco nd-language3

You can study a language all you want by reading..writing...movie watching and more but speaking is the "REAL DEAL" do not make the mistake of so many by waiting to speak.
Remove the ego and have fun..it is only a language not eternal salvation


Edited by healing332 on 22 August 2009 at 9:21pm

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Rhoda
Diglot
Senior Member
United States
Joined 5602 days ago

166 posts - 196 votes 
Speaks: English*, French
Studies: Latin, Swahili, Ancient Greek, German

 
 Message 3 of 50
22 August 2009 at 9:30pm | IP Logged 
It depends...

I do most of my French-speaking in a classroom. If I feel like I have something to say regarding the book we're studying, I'm very eager to speak. If, however, everything I had been thinking about has already been said, then I hate it when the professor calls on me and I have to make something up and hope it sounds good. I do like speaking French with my friends & siblings, but sometimes I get very shy when I'm visiting with my French teachers from middle or high school. I think it has something to do with not wanting to let them down.

As for Swahili--I'm dying to find someone to speak to!! I did have a brief Swahili phone conversation with someone, but I find it more difficult to converse on the phone in a language I am just beginning. French would probably be alright, but for some reason, there's a sort of barrier for a new language. Still, when I was really concentrating it went fine!

Edited by Rhoda on 22 August 2009 at 9:59pm

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William Camden
Hexaglot
Senior Member
United Kingdom
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Speaks: English*, German, Spanish, Russian, Turkish, French

 
 Message 4 of 50
22 August 2009 at 10:33pm | IP Logged 
You learn to speak a language by speaking it. Anyway, speaking personally, I have a somewhat thick skin which is getting thicker as I get older, and I discount other people's reactions, though I don't ignore them entirely.    

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Bao
Diglot
Senior Member
Germany
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Joined 5768 days ago

2256 posts - 4046 votes 
Speaks: German*, English
Studies: French, Spanish, Japanese, Mandarin

 
 Message 5 of 50
22 August 2009 at 11:15pm | IP Logged 
Yes. When I'm still really bad at a new language, it means that native or fluent speakers have to invest a lot into our communication. To me, that means that either I exploit the friendliness of that person or am indebted to them, which means that in the very least they have the right to expect fast progress of me. And I do not make fast progress. :'(
I am not inhibited like this when speaking to my current teacher, other learners, small children or strangers (when it's not meant to establish a relationship, but to ask a local for information e.g.)
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Ruan
Diglot
Groupie
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Joined 6183 days ago

95 posts - 101 votes 
Speaks: Portuguese*, English

 
 Message 6 of 50
23 August 2009 at 12:26am | IP Logged 
If I'm around monolinguals I feel awkward and words just won't come out of my mouth very
well. But whenever I'm among natives it just flows, and I get tongue-tied only when I'm
out of vocabulary.

Anyway, if you speak slowly, you haven't listened/read enough; if you speak clumsy, you
haven't practiced enough.
2 persons have voted this message useful



Aeroflot
Senior Member
United States
Joined 5604 days ago

102 posts - 115 votes 
Speaks: English*
Studies: French

 
 Message 7 of 50
23 August 2009 at 1:57am | IP Logged 
The only time I get really shy is when people put me on the spot and don't talk to me in the language, like last week when this Swedish lady asked what I knew in German. -Well I know lots, but talk to me and it will come out. heh.
1 person has voted this message useful



TheBiscuit
Tetraglot
Senior Member
Mexico
Joined 5925 days ago

532 posts - 619 votes 
Speaks: English*, French, Spanish, Italian
Studies: German, Croatian

 
 Message 8 of 50
23 August 2009 at 6:00am | IP Logged 
Aeroflot wrote:
The only time I get really shy is when people put me on the spot and don't talk to me in the language, like last week when this Swedish lady asked what I knew in German. -Well I know lots, but talk to me and it will come out. heh.

I get this too, and in Mexico it sometimes takes a lot for them to believe a foreigner can speak Spanish let alone a few more languages on top of that. I keep myself to myself nowadays but word has got out that I'm teaching French so no doubt I'll be asked to 'prove it' sometime soon... yawn.

Or they ask you to say some obscure, Mexican cultural word in another language then when you can't produce it, base their judgment of your language skills on that.


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