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Ending up disliking a TL and its culture | ||
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 Language Learning Forum : General discussion |  | |
| blackdahlia Pro Member United States Joined 4734 days ago 64 posts - 66 votes  Speaks: English* Studies: German, French Personal Language Map | Message 17 of 84 17 February 2012 at 9:41pm | IP Logged | |||||
Sometimes it takes people a while to warm up to you, especially if you are a foreigner. I lived in Korea for a while and one summer I taught English in a Korean school. At first people were kind of cold, but after I had been there a few weeks and they saw me more, they warmed up and became very friendly. And then there were the people who were friendly right off the bat, even when they didn't know me. I remember a lot of people helping me when I was confused about the bus! I'm not going to downplay your experience though, every culture isn't everybody 1 person has voted this message useful | ||||||
| Марк Senior Member Russian Federation Joined 5061 days ago 2096 posts - 2972 votes Speaks: Russian* | Message 18 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:04pm | IP Logged | |||||
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Well, about 85% of the time I was not well treated.
But I have a question, have you ever been to North or South America, Марк? Or maybe Italy, Spain? Maybe you consider it "normal" service because you're used to it, you grew up with it... but where I grew up things are quite different, at least in this area of customer service. I told my Russian wife and her Russian friends who live in Brazil about this, and they all agreed with me that the treatment is indeed VERY different. I haven't been there. But I mean normal: they do what they have to do, they answer your questions patiently. For example, when I was in Montenegro, I can't say it was better. Everything was more clear in Russia. Our workers did not talk much. The big difference was on the passport control however. The rudeness comes from the socialist times, when everything was in shortage and they really did you a favor if they sold you something. But it's practically gone. 1 person has voted this message useful | ||||||
| Марк Senior Member Russian Federation Joined 5061 days ago 2096 posts - 2972 votes Speaks: Russian* | Message 19 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:21pm | IP Logged | |||||
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As an example, I went to some stores at ТЦ Европейский (and some other malls, and also
banks, supermarkets, etc.) and usually the younger people were less rude (but usually also not very nice). But you first said you don't like the Russian way of treating others in general. So it means that Russians, especially older ones, treat everyone around them badly. So it includes relationships between friends, family members and so on. For example I heard (maybe I'm wrong) that in the West it's not common for a university teacher to spend extra time (his own, becides classes) for students. Also it is said that people become friends easily in Russia, are very open. For example, they can tell you the whole story of their lives in train, during the way. What in particular didn't you like in customer service in Russia? And what becides that? Edited by Марк on 17 February 2012 at 10:25pm 1 person has voted this message useful | ||||||
| Serpent Octoglot Senior Member Russian Federation serpent-849.livejour Joined 6602 days ago 9753 posts - 15779 votes 4 sounds Speaks: Russian*, English, FinnishC1, Latin, German, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese Studies: Danish, Romanian, Polish, Belarusian, Ukrainian, Croatian, Slovenian, Catalan, Czech, Galician, Dutch, Swedish | Message 20 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:34pm | IP Logged | |||||
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I'd also say it's changed a lot even during my lifetime, and I'm just 21.
And yeah, train journeys :D I was shocked at how much an old man was talking to a young couple on a train in Finland - till I heard enough to realize he's their relative :D 1 person has voted this message useful | ||||||
| espejismo Diglot Senior Member Russian Federation Joined 5056 days ago 498 posts - 905 votes Speaks: Russian*, English Studies: Spanish, Greek, Azerbaijani | Message 21 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:45pm | IP Logged | |||||
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I agree with fabriciocarraro on every point. In general, people in Moscow are very rude. It's not normal to yell, push, offend or threaten people in public places or treat others like crap even if you hate your life and everyone else around you. Obviously not everyone is rude or nasty, but I feel very sorry for the nice people who have to live under constant psychological pressure because of the generally negative atmosphere around them.
3 persons have voted this message useful | ||||||
| fabriciocarraro Hexaglot Winner TAC 2012 Senior Member Brazil russoparabrasileirosRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 4720 days ago 989 posts - 1454 votes Speaks: Portuguese*, EnglishB2, Italian, Spanish, Russian, French Studies: Dutch, German, Japanese | Message 22 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:51pm | IP Logged | |||||
Well, it was mostly about customer services, but another example: walking with my wife in Moscow, we wanted to know where was the closest post-office, and since she's Russian, I let her do all the talking. The first person she asked didn't even stop walking and shouted back "не знаю!!!" ("I don't know!!!"), I was shocked! If it was with me, a foreigner who doesn't speak Russian well... but she is Russian, from Moscow, and she was treated the same way. The other people she asked weren't that rude, but only one old man was nice. Another one, I witnessed a very heated argument at the post-office, when the attendant wanted to close and everyone there started shouting at her and at each other, cursing around, wanting for her to stay and also to be the first (since there was no line at all). I didn't say that I hate old Russian people, you got that completely wrong! All I said was that usually (and NOT always) when asking for information or buying something, old people tended to be more rude. Some youngs were rude too, but less in comparison to middle-aged and old people. I understand that all this might be "normal" for you, since you grew up in this culture, but it's not normal at all for me. Also, my wife and all her Russian friends who live now in Brazil say that it's very different, and they love how they're treated here. One of them went to Russian with her husband to visit her parents and couldn't take it anymore, because she had been living her for about 3 years and got used to be well treated. In customer services happened those thing I said before, where it seems to be a favor for them to be selling you something. As I said, about 85% of the times I was treated either with rudeness or indiference. Again, I don't mean to offend Russians at all. I like the language very much, love studying it, Moscow is a great and wonderful city, my wife is Russian and she's a great woman, I love all her family that I met in Russia (except one jackass uncle who won't even look me in the eye). It's just that, living there for 2 months was a very pleasant and also disappointing experience for me. It's not a place I'd like to live, because of all these things I said.
Well, I can't say about other countries and even about other universities, but in my university the teachers almost beg for the students to go to their private rooms and eliminate some doubts about the subject. What I've heard about some Russian universities (I might be wrong a well) is that some teachers ask the foreigners for money to get a 5 in their subjects, and if they don't pay, they get a bad grade. Is that any true? Edited by fabriciocarraro on 17 February 2012 at 10:57pm 4 persons have voted this message useful | ||||||
| espejismo Diglot Senior Member Russian Federation Joined 5056 days ago 498 posts - 905 votes Speaks: Russian*, English Studies: Spanish, Greek, Azerbaijani | Message 23 of 84 17 February 2012 at 10:56pm | IP Logged | |||||
There's another way to look at this "oppeness:" no concept of personal space and not minding your own business. I'm just saying that sometimes it can be too much. What "they say" about the US is not true. You really cannot make such generalizations about one of the most diverse nations with a population of more than 300 million. Incidentally, my Moscow friend just came back from her trip to California and said that she has never met such friendly and open people in such high concentrations, and she has been to quite a few places. Edited by espejismo on 17 February 2012 at 10:59pm 3 persons have voted this message useful | ||||||
| hrhenry Octoglot Senior Member United States languagehopper.blogs Joined 5135 days ago 1871 posts - 3642 votes Speaks: English*, SpanishC2, ItalianC2, Norwegian, Catalan, Galician, Turkish, Portuguese Studies: Polish, Indonesian, Ojibwe | Message 24 of 84 17 February 2012 at 11:07pm | IP Logged | |||||
While I've never been to Russia, I can say without hesitation that this is probably more of a big city thing than a Russian thing. Obviously, some big cities are quite friendly, but other cities tend to appear cold and uncaring. Every continent has at least one city like this where people are distant, in too much of a hurry to deal with you, whatever. It can seem like they're being rude, but I don't think they are. They're just too absorbed in their own life to deal with anything outside of it. R. == 11 persons have voted this message useful |
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