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hrhenry Octoglot Senior Member United States languagehopper.blogs Joined 5135 days ago 1871 posts - 3642 votes Speaks: English*, SpanishC2, ItalianC2, Norwegian, Catalan, Galician, Turkish, Portuguese Studies: Polish, Indonesian, Ojibwe
| Message 9 of 46 14 January 2011 at 9:59pm | IP Logged |
tornus wrote:
a discussion about parents who don't transmit their native language.
this a topic to have a rant.
i'm french, and i've some belgian roots. my grandmother was able to speak flemish, but she didn't teach it to my mother and thus my mother couldn't teach me too.
my mother told me that when she was young her mother would speak flemish with her parents (so my mother's grand parents) so the children weren't able to understand.
languages are not to exlude some people but to communicate together!
i feel pretty mad at the moment, i know it maybe a useless topic, but what do you think about, do you have suffer for similar experience? |
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I doubt that your grandmother would purposefully speak in another language just so the kids couldn't understand. That may be what your mother felt at the time, but I doubt that's what was happening.
That said, there's really no reason to be angry of a past you can't change. If it's a language you want to learn, why not just learn it, instead of being angry?
JMO, of course.
R.
==
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| Préposition Diglot Senior Member France aspectualpairs.wordp Joined 5119 days ago 186 posts - 283 votes Speaks: French*, EnglishC1 Studies: Russian, Arabic (Written), Swedish, Arabic (Levantine)
| Message 10 of 46 14 January 2011 at 10:38pm | IP Logged |
My grandparents can all speak Breton (except one that speaks Gallo), but it didn't quite reach their kids, and definitely not my cousins and me. One of my uncle, however, made and effort and my two cousins are at a Breton school, and can speak it fluently, which I'm really quite jealous of.
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| HKCanadian Diglot Newbie Canada Joined 5069 days ago 11 posts - 12 votes Speaks: English, Cantonese* Studies: French, Mandarin
| Message 11 of 46 15 January 2011 at 4:22am | IP Logged |
My mom's parents are Teochew (Chinese) dialect speakers, but my mom didn't pick it up as a child, so it's clearly not something I learned as a child.
Edited by HKCanadian on 15 January 2011 at 4:23am
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| edwin Triglot Senior Member Canada towerofconfusi&Registered users can see my Skype Name Joined 6469 days ago 160 posts - 183 votes 9 sounds Speaks: Cantonese*, English, Mandarin Studies: French, Spanish, Portuguese
| Message 12 of 46 16 January 2011 at 6:27am | IP Logged |
Here in Toronto, Canada, we have a high proportion of first-generation immigrants. One of my hobbies is to watch in public how the immigrant parents speak to their kids. Being a Chinese immigrant myself, I am particular interested in watching the Chinese parents.
I noticed something very bizarre. Most Hong Kong Chinese immigrants would speak to their kids in Cantonese, even in situations where they have to shout to embarrass themselves.
But the Mainland Chinese immigrants tend to speak to their kids in English, even if they themselves cannot speak English very well. I noticed in one case, two mothers were talking very loudly to each other in Mandarin. They then turned and spoke to their kids in English. Some kids I saw were only 2 or 3 years old, way before the age of "banana-rization". For years, I cannot figure out why they would do this.
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| Darklight1216 Diglot Senior Member United StatesRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 5105 days ago 411 posts - 639 votes Speaks: English*, French Studies: German
| Message 13 of 46 16 January 2011 at 6:52am | IP Logged |
hrhenry wrote:
I doubt that your grandmother would purposefully speak in another language just so the kids couldn't understand. That may be what your mother felt at the time, but I doubt that's what was happening.
That said, there's really no reason to be angry of a past you can't change. If it's a language you want to learn, why not just learn it, instead of being angry?
JMO, of course.
R.
==
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Have you ever spelled out words so that little kids won't understand you? speaking in another language for the same purpose isn't that far-fetched.
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| Snowflake Senior Member United States Joined 5964 days ago 1032 posts - 1233 votes Studies: Mandarin
| Message 14 of 46 16 January 2011 at 7:07am | IP Logged |
For ethnic Chinese in the US, immigrated or born here, this topic tends to get rather sticky. Generally, 2nd and 3rd generation ethnic Chinese do not speak, or really know, their grandparents' spoken tongue. I see relatively newly immigrated parents struggling with teaching their kids Chinese. Once in a while I will tell the parents that they're fighting a losing battle.
BTW... the term banana, used the way it is above, is usually considered an insult by my generation. Using the term that way tends to contribute to ethnic Chinese, born here, to NOT want to learn the language or learn about the culture of their grandparents. Please do not use the term as it builds walls.
Edited by Snowflake on 16 January 2011 at 7:19am
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| edwin Triglot Senior Member Canada towerofconfusi&Registered users can see my Skype Name Joined 6469 days ago 160 posts - 183 votes 9 sounds Speaks: Cantonese*, English, Mandarin Studies: French, Spanish, Portuguese
| Message 15 of 46 16 January 2011 at 7:34am | IP Logged |
Snowflake, it is funny when you mentioned it. I have been curiously studying the immigrants in the US and Canada, and found the environments in raising their kids are quite different between the 2 countries. Your post seems to confirm it.
A decade ago in Toronto, I would be amazed to hear any 2nd-gen Chinese immigrant utter a single Chinese word. But in recent years, I have met countless 2nd-gen Chinese immigrants who can speak fluent Chinese, although they admit that they can barely write or read.
I think what happened was that the immigrant parents started to think about the importance of their heritage languages, and enforce their kids to learn them.
I also observed that some 2nd-gen Chinese immigrants here occasionally referred themselves as "bananas" with no hard feeling.
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| alang Diglot Senior Member Canada Joined 7226 days ago 563 posts - 757 votes Speaks: English*, Spanish
| Message 16 of 46 16 January 2011 at 8:24am | IP Logged |
Well here are some of my stories starting with me of course.
My mother did speak to me in Bisaya when I was young. I was fluent in it, as I lived in Cebu for four years. The move to Canada was great, but when I started to speak more English, my mom just switched to English also. It did not occur to her that the other language was important, as long as we were communicating.
My auntie in the U.S. did talk to her kids in Bisaya, but the school told her to stop, because it would impede their learning. Of course that was a false statement by the school, and now it is encouraged to speak to kids in an additional language to learn more.
I personally am searching which heritage languages are in my family. I have taken it upon myself to learn some if I have interest in it. It is a shame, as when I meet some relatives I cannot communicate. Later the older generation dies out not really knowing the younger generation. It is a sad thing indeed.
I can only count about five relatives that still speak Spanish. Four of them are over 85yrs. of age. I am the only one under 35yrs. old.
Many reasons why a language is not passed down, but the many reasons why it should be are not as dominant IMO.
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