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Lack of concentration / depression / pain | ||
Tags: Learning Difficulty | ||
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 Language Learning Forum : Advice Center |  | |
| Gollum87 Diglot Newbie Yugoslavia Joined 3940 days ago 31 posts - 46 votes Speaks: Serbian*, English Studies: Italian | Message 9 of 16 07 July 2014 at 10:05pm | IP Logged | ||
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Thank you sooo much for your support...
I'm trying to do little things every day, to make my day better as possible as it could be.. But this condition really is so bad and frustrating.. I have no real reason for bad life.. I have a job (well, not a job of my dreams, but having a nice paid job in Serbia today is a good thing), I have friends, I have the person I love (the end of love was not the reason we broke, and maybe we will be together again, who knows.. although that hope is what kills me now, and good old memories from the past)... But the bad thoughts and emotions have come into my world, and I hardly even go out of bed... I'll go to a doctor in 3 days to speak and see what else to do to cope with those feelings and pain, sadness etc... Thank you guys :) Edited by Gollum87 on 07 July 2014 at 10:12pm 2 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| sctroyenne Diglot Senior Member United StatesRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 5394 days ago 739 posts - 1312 votes  Speaks: English*, French Studies: Spanish, Irish | Message 10 of 16 07 July 2014 at 10:37pm | IP Logged | ||
That's the thing with depression - you don't need a reason it can strike anyone. It's good you have an appointment set up. Don't feel bad if you have to take a break with your studying - you may have to focus on CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) exercises or groups for a while. They may also suggest mindfulness meditation which will get you in the habit of taking breaks. 2 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| Michel1020 Tetraglot Senior Member Belgium Joined 5020 days ago 365 posts - 559 votes Speaks: French*, English, Spanish, Dutch | Message 11 of 16 07 July 2014 at 11:33pm | IP Logged | ||
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In addition to evening milk - I would propose you an evening bath (swimming or washing yourself or both) - This should help with your sleep which is I think the most important.
Split your goals into smaller ones - many small goals will lead to success in big goal. Don't worry about things you cann't control. 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| shk00design Triglot Senior Member Canada Joined 4447 days ago 747 posts - 1123 votes Speaks: Cantonese*, English, Mandarin Studies: French | Message 12 of 16 07 July 2014 at 11:37pm | IP Logged | ||
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From personal experience my father suffered from depression for many years but not to the point of
taking medications regularly. Basically he has an "inferior complex" that he is not measuring up to other people who are successful in their careers / businesses. Although he is secure financially, he would talk about not having enough money all the time. My father is not "suicidal" but would sometimes make people around him feel they are not worth anything because they don't have a good job or a lot of money. My father took classes in Japanese because he has a few friends in Japan but that didn't get too far. He started learning to paint. He would spend the whole afternoon doing a canvass and not think about anything else. I spent 8 months improving Mandarin on my own and now I am focusing on French. By the new year I am looking to enrol in French classes in the evening. The objective is not just learning words and phrases but to increase my social contact. A number of years ago I got into a relationship that didn't work out. But instead of being depress over the matter, I joined a music group. At that time I could only play violin. Sometime later I decided to take up piano playing. I got a keyboard and started learning some popular songs. Right now I am dividing my time between my weekly music practice with my band, playing songs on my keyboard and learning languages. Some people think the only way to deal with "depression" is by taking medication. Even after that you can't really be 100% cure. The 1 thing you need to do in life is to find activities you enjoy doing and engage yourself throughout the week. If you enjoy taking photos on certain days of the week you would find someplace with nice scenery and take some photos. If you enjoy music, you can pick up a guitar or a keyboard and play whenever you feel depress. Take some music lessons if you have to but don't make the lessons occupy too much of your time that all you are doing is repeating exercises a teacher assigned the week before. Play the music you enjoy as much as as possible. Last year at a Christmas party, 1 man sang some Irish folk tunes. Several people on flute, guitar, cello and myself on violin played along after he sang the melody once. When it comes to learning languages, going to classes and repeating words & phrases can be boring. What I did with Mandarin is that I would look for TV shows and radio programs (now you can find many on the Internet) and watch certain number of hours in the language each day. The shows I watch are not specific for language learning. The list includes movies, drama series and reality shows on TV like singing contests. I would always have a computer file or a piece of paper around to write down the new words & phrases. A good TV show is entertainment and when it is in a foreign language, you are learning in the process with more enjoyment and less pain. Edited by shk00design on 07 July 2014 at 11:54pm 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| Michel1020 Tetraglot Senior Member Belgium Joined 5020 days ago 365 posts - 559 votes Speaks: French*, English, Spanish, Dutch | Message 13 of 16 08 July 2014 at 7:50am | IP Logged | ||
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A good night of sleep here make me add two things.
First about being stronger. You probably are stronger than you think and most people around you probably are weaker than they look (everybody has weaknesses). Second about languages learning - if by any unfortune you would lose everything you learn so far. Don't worry. Everthing will come back to you more easily and faster when you come back to it. I agree with others on activities. Enjoy what you do. Don't be ashame of doing nothing for a while. You don't need to learn to be a musician to benefit from music. Listening to music can help a lot. Here 3 musics that reenergize me but you can find your own. Tchaikowski 1812 opening I will survive (both in English and a russian version found on youtube) You'll never walk alone by the Liverpool fans. Reading a book that captures you could help - however don't forget to move your body every now and then. 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| Gollum87 Diglot Newbie Yugoslavia Joined 3940 days ago 31 posts - 46 votes Speaks: Serbian*, English Studies: Italian | Message 14 of 16 09 July 2014 at 3:27pm | IP Logged | ||
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I've been to a doctor today morning, speaking for one hour, and she told me it is depression and since it happens for a long period, I must start with anti-depressive medicins and therapy... She told me to be pantient and open with her, take my medicins, and it will be better... About learning, she told me I should make a decission, if I feel I can learn it and it makes me feel good, I should do it, if not, I should stop and focus on listening to music, movies and doing other things... Edited by Gollum87 on 09 July 2014 at 3:31pm 2 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| leosmith Senior Member United States Joined 6553 days ago 2365 posts - 3804 votes Speaks: English* Studies: Tagalog | Message 15 of 16 16 July 2014 at 6:43am | IP Logged | ||
Just curious - did she mention regular exercise? 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| Bao Diglot Senior Member Germany tinyurl.com/pe4kqe5 Joined 5769 days ago 2256 posts - 4046 votes Speaks: German*, English Studies: French, Spanish, Japanese, Mandarin | Message 16 of 16 16 July 2014 at 4:14pm | IP Logged | ||
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Good to hear that you went to see a doctor. :)
I don't know about your situation, but one thing that made things worse for me during my depression was getting advice about leading a more healthy lifestyle and not being able to do it. Like, thinking I should do at least one hour of exercise a day and not being able to motivate myself, and then feeling guilty because surely, if I got that exercise I wouldn't be feeling as bad as I did. Surely. But, sometimes that just is not possible. And, to say it with Whitney Houston, It's not alright but it's okay. [In hindsight I know that assumption was wrong, at that time my best efforts were just not enough.] The medication will probably give you just the little bit of extra strength that is needed to start improving, but to keep on improving - CBT and mindfulness therapy are said to have the best outcomes. (Basically, being depressed teaches your brain how to be depressed and with each episode the risk of getting a relapse increases. CBT or mindfulness therapy for depression can help you improve during active episodes, and reduce the risk of a relapse. Other therapies also help during the episode, but don't protect as much.) As for language learning, I for one had a hard time learning to accept that my performance and my mood vary quite a bit from day to day, and that sometimes I don't enjoy or even hate doing things I used to love. And that that's okay, and that hating them once doesn't mean that I will hate them forever. If you can't stop thinking negatively about yourself for not performing the way you expect to perform it's probably a good idea to take a break from classes or learning. Otherwise it might work to just decide for today, because when you're depressed, it's very easy to think about how your decision will be permanent and how you have to make the right decision, and you have to make it now, but you don't know what will be the right decision etc etc. And, if you decide to try to study (or get other language exposure) today, that means that you only do as much as you manage that particular day without overdoing it and hurting yourself. Edited by Bao on 16 July 2014 at 4:15pm 3 persons have voted this message useful |
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