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Undelivered language heritage | ||
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 Language Learning Forum : General discussion |  | |
| tornus Diglot GroupieRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 4953 days ago 82 posts - 113 votes  Speaks: French*, English Studies: Spanish, Swedish, Danish | Message 1 of 46 14 January 2011 at 7:37pm | IP Logged | ||
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a discussion about parents who don't transmit their native language.
this a topic to have a rant. i'm french, and i've some belgian roots. my grandmother was able to speak flemish, but she didn't teach it to my mother and thus my mother couldn't teach me too. my mother told me that when she was young her mother would speak flemish with her parents (so my mother's grand parents) so the children weren't able to understand. languages are not to exlude some people but to communicate together! i feel pretty mad at the moment, i know it maybe a useless topic, but what do you think about, do you have suffer for similar experience? 3 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| Darklight1216 Diglot Senior Member United StatesRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 4910 days ago 411 posts - 639 votes Speaks: English*, French Studies: German | Message 2 of 46 14 January 2011 at 7:44pm | IP Logged | ||
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No one in my family (that I know of) can speak any language except for English, but I'm always dismayed when people I know tell stories similar to yours.
One woman from my church speaks one of the more obscure Western European languages and I remember listening to her toddler speak in (Finnish? Croatian? Serbian?) and then switch over to English. I thought it was the coolest thing because the kid was only two. I'm not sure if he still speaks both languages, but I hope so. 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| The Real CZ Senior Member United States Joined 5459 days ago 1069 posts - 1495 votes Speaks: English* Studies: Japanese, Korean | Message 3 of 46 14 January 2011 at 7:50pm | IP Logged | ||
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Well, the language in the country you're living in is the most important, and people want their kids to know the native language of the country they reside in rather than the native language of where the parents came from.
2 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| LanguageSponge Triglot Senior Member United Kingdom Joined 5576 days ago 1197 posts - 1487 votes Speaks: English*, German, French Studies: Welsh, Russian, Japanese, Slovenian, Greek, Italian | Message 4 of 46 14 January 2011 at 8:00pm | IP Logged | ||
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My dad is Italian and didn't teach it to me as a kid - which annoys me even more now that he's teaching it to my half-brother, who is five. My half-brother's Italian is actually probably better than my own, and that just drives me nuts.
I had a friend in school whose parents both spoke Urdu, and he was always annoyed that his parents never taught him it when he was younger. He ended up trying to teach it to himself, and took the Urdu GCSE papers at age 16, and failed, getting the lowest grade possible - which just annoyed him even more. Jack 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| tracker465 Senior Member United States Joined 5162 days ago 355 posts - 496 votes Speaks: English* Studies: German, Spanish, Dutch | Message 5 of 46 14 January 2011 at 8:09pm | IP Logged | ||
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Although I never got to meet them, I believe that my great grand parents spoke Pennsylvania "Dutch", which is actually a German dialect! I need to ask my father about this one, but of course it was never passed on to us, and I feel that a part of my heritage is lost, especially since this dialect is named for the state in which I was born and reside!
Regarding those parents who do not pass on their ancestoral tongues to their children, unfortunately it happens a lot and is quite simple. My mother saw this happen all the time with the Hispanic students in the classes she taught, and a good friend of mine (a language fanatic at that!) hasn't passed on Croatian to his children. I asked the latter about this one time, as it seemed surprising since he is such a language nut himself, and he said that his children can understand things perfectly, but simply refuse to speak Croatian and also will not sit down and read or write Croatian. If the culture is telling people that they can get by with English, for example, or that the language their parents speak is uncool, or whatever...how are the parents ever supposed to reach their children and say "Look, learning this might not be as fun as going to the mall with your friends, but in 20 years you'll be happy for it." 3 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| tracker465 Senior Member United States Joined 5162 days ago 355 posts - 496 votes Speaks: English* Studies: German, Spanish, Dutch | Message 6 of 46 14 January 2011 at 8:19pm | IP Logged | ||
I was thinking about this a bit, and I know that this same scenario is so true with many people to whom I speak in my area, who never learned Pennsylvania "Dutch". I do not think that the language was never taught simply to exclude people, or so that the adults could talk about the children behind their backs. Namely, I feel that the parents never taught the language maybe because they saw it as being not useful, the children weren't interested in it, they weren't sure how to teach it, wanted the children to speak perfect French, etc, but then this cropped up as a biproduct. Since the children couldn't understand what was being said, why not use the tongue when talking about things that they shouldn't be hearing? I definitely see it as a byproduct though, as opposed to a planned effort to exclude. 2 persons have voted this message useful | |||
| Cowlegend999 Groupie CanadaRegistered users can see my Skype Name Joined 4954 days ago 72 posts - 94 votes Speaks: English* Studies: Mandarin, Cantonese | Message 7 of 46 14 January 2011 at 9:19pm | IP Logged | ||
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My dad can speak Italian but he never taught any to me :( I wish I could speak it because I feel excluded
when he speaks to my grandparents in Italian (even though they speak English too) 1 person has voted this message useful | |||
| cathrynm Senior Member United States junglevision.co Joined 5935 days ago 910 posts - 1232 votes Speaks: English* Studies: Japanese, Finnish | Message 8 of 46 14 January 2011 at 9:58pm | IP Logged | ||
I think there's a potential for self-deception among parents of children who haven't passed on language. Maybe it's just hard to fathom your own child not knowing your native language. I've heard the same story many times, the parents make the kids say a few words to look cute, and maybe they use a few words around the house, but then the TV goes on and school and friends become more important. The child may not respond in the language because they just don't know how to use it. When the child opens his mouth, the parent is confronted with the unpleasant truth. Children pick up on that and stop trying. That's my theory at least. For me, even now, I think my father doesn't quite know how to react to the idea of me stumbling around with textbook Japanese. If he doesn't have to hear me, I think he's interested in the idea of me learning to write and all stuff, but actually talking, well, it is all just too strange for both of us. 2 persons have voted this message useful |
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